GREETINGS COMRADES.

THIS IS MY CAR I KEEP IN GLORIOUS RUSSIA. YES, IT IS GOLD PLATED PORSCHE. STYLISH YES?

YOU WORK FOR ME AND YOU TOO CAN BE RICH AND SOPHISTICATED LIKE ME.

LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT RUSSIAN POLICE, THEY ARE MOSTLY DOGS.

HOWEVER...

MORE NEED I SAY?

NO COP IN AMERIKA LIKE THIS, RUSSIAN WOMEN ARE TOUGH AND BEAUTIFUL.

YOU VISIT RUSSIA SOMETIME YES? YOU MEET NICE PEOPLE THERE, LIKE MY TWO COUSINS, ARKADIY AND YEGOR, THEY GOOD GUYS.

YOU GIVE THEM LOTS OF MONEY AND VODKA AND THEY SHOW YOU GOOD TIME.

WATCH OUT FOR YEGOR THOUGH, HE GO LITTLE CRAZY AFTER 11TH VODKA. DON'T GIVE HIM CORKSCREW AND LET HIM NEAR CAT. OTHERWISE HE IS TOP MAN.

SOON THEY COME TO AMERIKA, I HAVE JOB FOR THEM...THEY HAVE PARTY WITH HARWOOD...IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.

HELLO COMRADES

HERE IS GREAT VIDEO OF ME IN WHITE SUIT AND SILLY WIG SINGING WITH MY COMRADE ARMY FRIENDS A FEW YEARS BACK.

I AM GREAT SINGER AS YOU SEE.

I HAVE BRILLIANT IDEA FOR AKAKIEVICH CORPORATION INVESTMENT IDEA IN 2009...NASCAR TEAM!!

HERE YOU SEE ME DRIVING IN TEST CAR.

THE TEAM NAME AS YOU SEE IS 'COSSACKS'. I AM BRILLIANT YES?

OH, AND BY THE WAY. AS YOU KNOW, HARWOOD IS RELEASING HIS JACK PALMS NOVEL IN MAY 2009...AGAIN! PAH!

SO NEW CAMPAIGN FOR LOYAL AKAKIEVICH COMRADES IS VERY SIMPLE:

DO NOT BUY JACK WAKES UP

EVEN CZECH ARMADA CAN UNDERSTAND THIS SIMPLE RULE!! HAHAHA!

AND IF YOU FIND DOGS WHO DO BUY THIS BOOK OF LIES YOU HAVE MY PERMISSION TO TORTURE THEM OR AT LEAST BURN THEIR BEDS.

NEW PLAN COMRADES. WE CAN TURN THIS TO OUR ADVANTAGE.

AS YOU KNOW, I GET ROYALTIES FROM THIS BOOK AS I AM MENTIONED IN IT. SO NEW PLAN IS:

BUY THIS BOOK!

ALSO VERY SIMPLE PLAN THAT EVEN CZECH ARMADA CAN DO.

YOU CAN HELP MAKE ME MORE WEALTHY THAN I ALREADY AM.

HERE IS LINK TO WEBSITE SHOWING BOOK INFORMATION: DOG HARWOOD.COM.

YOU CAN ALSO SEE BOOK COVER ON RIGHT SIDE OF MY BRILLIANT WEBSITE.

YOUR TZAR,

ALEXI

HELLO COMRADES.

THE NEW YEAR IS COMING SOON.

I, YOUR GLORIOUS LEADER WILL ENSURE THAT 2009 IS A PROSPEROUS AND EXCITING YEAR FOR YOU.

FEW SIMPLE RULES YOU MUST OBEY FIRST:

1. PAY ME $250 'SECURITY' MONEY EVERY MONTH. DO NOT FAIL TO PAY.

2. YOU JOIN MY BED BURNING CREW. NEED HELP TO BURN BEDS OF DOGS IN LIST ON BED BURNING.

3. FIND HARWOOD AND BRING HIM TO ME ALIVE. I TORTURE HIM PERSONALLY.

MEANTIME, HERE PICTURE OF BEAUTIFUL RUSSIAN ARMY SOLDIER...FORGET CZECH ARMADA, THEY UGLY THUGS.

DOES THIS LOOK LIKE MAN YOU CAN TRUST?
NO, IT IS FACE OF BOURGEOIS CAPITALIST DOG.

SUIT IS NICE THOUGH. PROBABLY STOLEN.

DO NOT VISIT SETHHARWOOD.COM, IT BAD FOR YOU.

YOU VISIT THIS SITE ONLY, IT ALL YOU NEED AND YOUR HEALTH BE BETTER (NO BULLET TO HEAD).

PEOPLE IN BED BURNING LIST VISIT SETHHARWOOD.COM, THEY IN TROUBLE. HOWEVER, THEY GET OFF LIST IF THEY POST COMMENT HERE.

EXCEPT HARWOOD, HE PERMANENTLY ON LIST...DOG!

ENJOY PICTURE OF KNOWLEDGEFUL AND BEAUTIFUL RUSSIAN GIRL.

YOUR TZAR, ALEXI.

PERHAPS YOU HAVE HEARD OF HARWOOD PROPAGANDA KNOWN AS CZECH ARMADA. THIS MINOR GROUP TRY TO PROMOTE DOG HARWOOD IN ATTEMPT TO TAKE OVER CRIME WORLD.

THEY ARE FOOLS.

THEY NOT KNOW POWER OF COSSACK CREW.

THIS IS ME IN FRONT LEADING COSSACK CREW TO GLORY. NOTICE MODERN RUSSIAN MOTORCAR, STYLISH YES.

HELLO AND WELKOM TO MY GLORIOUS WEBSITE.

AS PART OF NEW BUSINESS STRATEGY I HAVE MADE THIS WEBSITE. ALSO, THIS SITE'S PURPOSE IS TO SET STRAIGHT LIES ABOUT ME IN JACK PALMS SERIES.

MAIN LIE IS THAT I AM DEAD, SHOT IN HEAD. I AM OF COURSE NOT DEAD. JACK PALMS IS LIAR!

SO PLEASE TAKE PART IN INTELLECTUAL DISCUSSIONS ON THIS SITE. YOU ARE FREE TO COMMENT, NO MEMBERSHIP ON THIS SITE. GLASNOST IS GOOD THING!

- YOUR TSAR, ALEXI AKAKIEVICH